ive already screamed about this on twitter but i dont care im screaming here too it makes me UNREASONABLY UPSET that this isnt in the show its such an IMPORTANT MOMENT ITS SO PIVOTAL FOR MUSTANG SPECIFICALLY
his guilt is SO IMPORTANT as part of his character and this is a literal smack in the face depiction of that guilt given form he’ll never forgive himself and no one can ever give him that either and i mean not just because this one guy said so but this is how Arakawa shOWS us that
both him and Hawkeye REPEATEDLY talk about how they joined the military of their own free will, that they made the choice to serve, that they willingly carried out their orders knowing what it meant they constantly carry that knowledge and guilt with them and acknowledge it openly on multiple occasions
and they KEEP doing that even after Ishval because if they don’t then everything they DID do would be for nothing it would mean nothing and it cant they have to move forward and they have to continue to pursue the future they dream of because they H A V E T O
they dont think they deserve forgiveness they dont think they deserve happiness but they still want to build a better future for others so that no one else has to feel what they feel, or do what they have done, and theyll take the corpses they piled on their own backs and carry them forever if it means they can achieve that
and FucKING HAWKEYE likens it to equivalent exchange, using alchemy to explain it, the thing that consumed her father and made her afraid of him and what brought that same man to make her the bearer of his lifes work, his legacy first and his daughter second, and then another man who she followed into war and blood and horror and she watched him use the secrets she gave him to decimate an entire race of people and then he used that same pOWER TO FREE HER OF THAT LEGACY! THAT BURDEN THAT SECRET!
